September 26, 2018

It's been about two months since we added a new member to Team R. Miss Hattie (aka #Hattiegirl) settled in quickly and made sure that her presence was felt. She bites, she barks, she paws at our arms and feet. She's chewed, she's eaten, she's cause laughter and worry. And I love her. Almost as much as I love you Baby.

Here's to all of the four-legged members of Team R. Forever will they be in our hearts.

Team R Roll Call

Perfect. In time, in place, in size and shape. 

Everything about you was just what was needed

Prior to you it was quiet

Possibly too much

Everyone who met you loved you

Rightfully so. You were wonderful

Filling a hole that wasn't empty yet

It was amazing to see you blossom

Only when you were a single did we really learn about your personality

Nothing prepared us for your leaving us

And we will never forget you

Hardly a sound when we met

Almost too small to be believed

Too long without a furry, fuzzy companion for us

Then you were spotted and it was instant

I knew that you would be ours with that first gasp

Each day has been an adventure, and I love it

Welcome to the team new girlie

Each member is unique and loved

Always know that we love you

Remember that we will always come back

Every time we go, you are with us

Three years between members was a long time

Even though it was good to be free, we missed it

Always looking, checking for the right time; right friend

Missing those who were no longer in the house

Rescuing you was amazing

May 26, 2019

Heavy

Each thread may be small

But woven together with their fellows

They all become

Heavy

The enamel and bronze are only parts

The engraving on the front can't even be felt

Pinned to the chest of the officer it can  feel

Heavy

A shot is small

1.5 ounces in volume

Added together over the night, those ounces will be

Heavy

The pieces and springs are tiny

Only bits of metal apart

It's when they are assembled that they become

Heavy

The threads of Kevlar are heavy

On the shoulders of the officer that wear it

A life time of pain is the reward

For staying alive for the career

The badge can be seen by all

It's a symbol of good to most

Of oppression to some

And to evil to a rare few

For some one is enough

For some one is the start

For some one leads to hangovers and dry mouth

For some one leads to courts and jails and death

A pistol on the hip is heavy

The power of death over life

Contained in a plastic and leather holster

At the ready to save or take a life

The Kevlar can't cover the mind

The shield won't keep the demons at bay

The drink will only numb the mind for a short time

And the pistol is the last resort

When it all gets too heavy

1-800-273-8255

April 30, 2019

Difficult

The hours that I spend at work, away from you

It's difficult

Away from the one that I love the most

It's difficult

When I have to stay late, even though the money is good

It's difficult

You go into the office early because of so much to do

It's difficult

No warm fuzzy head on the pillow by yours

It's difficult

Limited travel because of our calendars

It's difficult

Seeing you smile when I greet you at the door

Makes it worth it

Holding your hand as we walk down the street

Makes it worth it

A wink, a quick kiss, a pat on my butt

Makes it worth it

Having our goal defined and seeing it getting closer

Makes it worth it

March 21, 2019

For World Poetry Day I write these words. They are simple and off the top of my head. Enjoy them.

World Poetry Day 2019

Last night I laid in our bed alone

You were out of town on business

That I understood, as it is the time of year

But this was a different alone

I missed all of you girls

You, and Fiona, and Pepper

My girls were all gone

Even though you are all always with me

I set the timer for two hours

And the sound to a rhythmic tick-tock

I drifted off quickly and then snapped awake

And saw that it had only been a few minutes

There was too much room

My feet were free and unfettered

My shoulders not touching yours

No gentle breathing, from you or them, in my ears

I closed my eyes and pictured you

Your smile, your eyes

I pictured Pepper and her fuzzy ears

Fiona's white face by my face

That was what I needed and to sleep I fell

In my dreams you were there

With Our Girls

And I didn't miss you as much for the night

There's Hope. There's Help

One decision made. Haste. Hurting. Hopeless

Eight hundred, thousand, million questions after. All left unanswered

Two ways to go. To flee from or to fight the monster

Seven days in a week. One at a time is all you should focus on

Three phone calls. Or texts. Or emails. Any way to reach out. Many ways to reach out

Eight days to plan a funeral? It's never enough
Too many things left unsaid. By you. By us
Five on each side of a casket
Five to fold and present a flag of remembrance

- For Mike

Love Beat Poem January 2019

Love is - many things. Complicated and easy. Filled with highs and lows and if anyone knows how to navigate and delegate and mediate - it's you. And me. We. It's simple to see that my love for you is all encompassing. People have all seen how I adore you. Admire you, would do anything. I live for and would die without you.

Love is - deceptively simple and a ton of work. Getting to know every tic and quirk. Each story and tale whether happy or sad, seeing each other glad or mad. Laughing, crying and talking for hours on end. Not wanting the conversation to end. Love is all of this.

Love is - never a drag, no time ever lags. It's wanting to see each naked no matter what sags. It's not letting the little things bother you, telling each other when you're feeling blue, and knowing that feeling is absolutely true. Consolations after bad dreams, silly jokes rolling eyes, plans and schemes.

Love is love is love. Corny but true. And I'll never, for all of my days, stop loving you.

Anniversary #10

Ten years of us, of love, of We

The best ten years of life for me

We’ve shared laughs and tears and pain

But rest assured that I’d go through it again

With you

I haven’t been the best that I could

And I haven’t always done what I should

You given me joy that I barely deserve

You’re the love of my life and that’s for sure

I love you

The best doggie mommy that our girls could have had

Losing them both made us immeasurably sad

But the memories of you with them makes me smile

And the pain of their loss is gone for a while

They love you

We’ve traveled the country and seen the sights

We’ve held hands in the desert and on Alaskan nights

Seen colors of leaves in the autumn Maine sun

And watched herds of animals on the run

Me and you

Ten more years, and then more and more

Together we’ll see what the world has in store

We are the best match and I give you my heart

Forever, together, and never apart

Team R