Today I am 38 years old. I don't have any fancy plans, other than to get some rest and then spend the day with my wonderful wife. But I did have to work. We had one call all night in the rain, but it was a good one. A car had missed a turn in the road and ended up on the train tracks. The driver was not surprisingly arrested for DUI and I got to write about the entire thing.
I took some of the words in this rather long set from the Grandiloquent Dictionary. See if you can spot them.
A Birthday Car Crash/Arrest/Writing Experience
When the call came out it didn't take much for an
autotonsorialist like myself to think "DUI."
She was no beldam. In fact, she was young
and dressed for a night out.
Perhaps it was a
cacestogenous upbringing that
led her to drink.
One thing was for sure
she did not suffer from dipsophobia.
The car reeked of booze.
Upon our arrival, she began to
explaterate. We couldn't get a word in
edgewise.
Under arrest, she was taken away by my partner.
The sound of her car being towed off of
the tracks was fluctisonant.
It became obvious enough that
she was gambrinous. But where she had been
she would not say
We knew this would happen to her.
There was plenty to indicate the
hamartithia from her.
A check of her wallet
for bond money found her to be quite impecunious.
She began her jactancy
with us after a time. It didn't last long.
As she was being processed, she played with
her hair, causing a krobylos to come into being
When we did not believe her stories
she was overcome with lypothymia
She decided to "come clean" with us
and say who was really driving. But several
different stories made me think
she was simply practicing her mentimutation.
She started to nicitate
when we called her stories false. She knew
she'd been caught
As we got closer and closer to her
being released, her oenophlygia became
more and more apparent
We told her that driving drunk
was not the end of the world, but
maybe this would give her a mild case
of potophobia for a while
She was just a quean
There was time for her to
learn from this mistake
And though the third raith was almost over
The fourth had yet to begin.
She didn't listen to us
The alcohol had made
her saprostomous. Time for
her to go home
When told that she could
leave, she was overcome with
tachyphrasia, thanking us repeatedly
She ran from the station
like it was an utlesse, even though
she'd been set free
Walking up the sidewalk, she seemed
quite vauntie. And why not?
She was alive after all
I was happy she was unhurt.
But her drinking style will
lead to a wanweird I think.
Jail time and xerophagy
would do her some good
Too much more drinking and she'll end up
a yaud. Like so many others around town.
And another zob is not
what we need around here.
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